For the Children: Saying what they never could – Poem

We’re crying out for our fathers and mothers,

And pleading desperately to our sisters and brothers.

We’re screaming for our uncles and aunts,

And to all others, with the trust our love grants.

Our fear has reached a terrible peak,

For in our trust, we’re delicate and weak.

So before our hearts fail and we lose control,

Lost to tragic pains taking their toll.

We need to ask you an honest question,

One that always gets failed to mention.

If you love us as much as you say you do,

Why do you hurt us so bad, it pierces right through?

And the innocence that was once treasured so dear,

Is destroyed, lost with the falling of each tear.

But surely one question doesn’t seem enough,

For our lives are far more complicated and rough.

We’ve become victims of all your deepest fears,

Why should we be punished for all your tears?

If you love us, why are we subject to all your rage?

Until we slowly die inside, all hope lost with age.

Why must we be responsible for all of your mistakes?

Causing enough tears to fill even the largest of lakes.

Why must we channel all of your hate?

Causing us to spiral towards a terrible fate.

Because it is in you that we idolize,

So how can we survive through all the lies?

Why is there such silence that we never know?

What the feelings are that you really show.

Why do our mouths always feel sealed with tape?

As we’re battered by violence, abuse, molestation, and rape.

Why can’t you just let us speak our mind?

Would the price be so terrible, the truth so unkind?

Why are we supposed to live the way you want us to?

Shouldn’t we be allowed to decide what we want to do?

Why do we fall helplessly to all your lust?

Causing innocence lost to hatred and disgust.

Don’t you realize what you’re doing?

Don’t you care about the lives you’re screwing?

Don’t you know that we’re learning everything wrong?

And don’t you care that at this pace, we won’t live long?

It’s what you do that is important, not just what you say.

But in the end, you never listen to us anyway.

So we’re pleading for you to hear our call,

Before all hope is lost, and we truly do fall.

And to all those that say it couldn’t be me,

Look in the mirror, what kind of child do you see?

For it is us that suffer for what others did to you,

So please, take a stand, don’t let the cycle of pain continue

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From Across the Room – Poem

Why can’t I think of what to say?

Why can’t this be easier to do?

If things were different, I’d find a way,

To show what kind of love is here for you.

Every day, our paths will cross,

Yet you never truly lay eyes on me,

I wish I could voice the pain of my loss,

But my heart won’t let my tongue go free.

Forever in silence is where my heart goes,

As I sit here, lost to my gloom,

One day, I may share what my heart knows,

But for now, I just stare from across the room

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On Sides Divided – Poem

My daily chores continue today, as they always do,

Me and my brother feed the animals and hunt for food.

For months, rumors of war and rebellion filter through,

Father and my brother show a strange attitude.

As we sit in the woods, waiting for an animal to come,

I turn to my brother, wondering what he’ll say.

Quietly, I ask him where his anger is coming from,

He replies, “They have no right!”, and remains quiet the rest of the day.

Still not understanding, I later try to talk to dad,

I ask, “Why should we try to force those states to stay?”

Starring at me for a moment, my father just looks sad,

His reply, “We can’t break the union, there’s just no other way!”

While I slept that night, I tried to understand why,

Why should we judge how others should live their lives?

Thinking about the government telling Virginia how to live or die,

Causes such a feeling of disgust, it’s like being stabbed with hot knives.

The next morning, a post rider approaches the main house,

Among the stack, a letter of intent to leave the union.

As my father reads the letter, everyone is as quiet as a mouse,

When he finishes, my brother shouts, “Fight or run, pick one!”

Looking up in surprise, I realize he’s looking at me,

“Why would you say that?” I ask with fear.

His reply, “I know you agree with that crap, and you have sympathy!”

And I see all his respect for me fall in a single tear.

Knowing I’m no longer welcome, I pack and leave that day,

My mother cried, but my father and brother wouldn’t even look at me.

I could hear my mother shouting, “There must be another way!”

But knowing I’m no longer welcome, I left, hoping to help Virginia be free.

I could never have realized what I was getting myself in to,

As I grabbed a musket and received my orders.

My first battle, at Fredericksburg, was tough to get through,

As we valiantly protected our northern border.

But as we drove the Yankees back, I was shocked,

For one of my own shots has taken down my own father.

I was hurting so bad; it felt like my lungs were locked,

And as they retreated, I heard the cries of my brother.

I was scared; I couldn’t believe what was happening to me,

I was fighting against the people I loved and grew with.

Feeling trapped, my father’s death is all I could see,

Recalling stories in the bible, ones I thought were just myth.

 

 

 

It hurt so bad, remembering the stories my father would tell,

As he tucked me into bed at home, every night.

As I remember the story of brothers that fought and fell.

Just to prove their ideas were the ones that were right.

Helping move the injured from the field of battle,

And collecting the muskets and supplies from the dead.

Watching them move the prisoners like they were cattle,

As I wrapped a small cut I sustained on my head.

For the next two months, I was involved in many fights,

As we pushed our way north of the Potomac.

I know eventually my brother will again be in my sights.

And that very thought always made me feel sick.

Fight after fight, we pushed our way through,

And the freedom of Virginia seemed set in stone.

Our rights are being protected with everything we do,

As we prepare to kick Lincoln off his throne.

Even as we march north, I sense urgency in our ranks,

For rumors of a major battle has begun up ahead.

Unprepared and worried, we double our march along the river banks,

Exhausted from the long march, our bodies scream for a bed.

But soon, the sounds of cannons fill our ears,

As we’re told to form a line near a field.

As we form up, we hear echoes of soldiers’ cheers,

Because of our General Lee, the commander that would never yield.

But with the orders that were given to me,

I wonder what will this day bring to our goal.

Because our target is so far, we can barely see,

And the open field will surely take its toll.

With yells of victory, the first groups head out,

Hearing their commanders give words of courage.

Even at this great distance, the enemy cannons drowned out every shout,

Unsympathetically killing, no matter the rank or age.

Finally, it’s our turn to march across the open field,

A group of trees on the other end is our goal to reach.

Our orders are to never back down, to never yield,

What a terrible lesson they’re about to teach.

Even as the cannon fire and shots ring out,

I can’t help but wonder where my brother might be.

If I got close enough, would he answer to my shout?

Or does he hate me so much, that he would simply kill me.

 

 

 

Soon I will know, for I’ve reached a wooden fence,

As I jump over, I feel pebbles smack against my face.

For a cannonball hit the ground, making things go tense,

I watch in horror as bodies fly by, face expressions set in place.

By now, more than half my group is wiped out,

And for the first time, I hear cries for us to retreat.

“We must push forward”, I hear the commander shout,

But just as he finishes, a musket shot knocks him off his feet.

With our commander possibly dead, everyone flees,

Except for a few of us that continue to push ahead.

But suddenly, a sharp impact forces me to my knees,

For a moment, I surely thought I was dead.

It wasn’t until a cannon shot rang in my ears,

That I was able to force my eyes open.

I felt wetness on my face that wasn’t my tears,

I frantically looked around to see what I can.

But my body was so heavy, I couldn’t move,

And all I could feel was pain in my head.

I could tell that I’d fallen into some kind of grassy groove.

And as I lay there, I know soon I will be dead.

As I feel myself fading in the smoke and grass,

I see figures hovering over me strangely distorted.

Suddenly, I notice a large dark mass,

Lifting me off the lawn, I feel fully supported.

Hearing a voice that sounds strangely familiar,

Telling me that everything will be alright.

The feeling in the voice is very peculiar,

I hear sadness as he tells me to hold on tight.

As he continues to talk, I realize who it is,

My brother has come to take me back.

Thinking of my family and all the happy times I miss,

As I slowly feel my body going slack.

The last words I hear my brother say,

Are the words, “I’m sorry” echoing with sadness.

But now it’s too late, my body has slipped away,

And all his pain is lost to madness.

My family is broken, and all is now lost,

For the true outcome of war is never decided.

History shows us the terrible cost,

When we fall on sides divided.

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Website Update!!!

Although this blog is the spot to catch my poems and some updates, it’s only part of a bigger online home for me as an Author.  I invite everyone to please visit my website!

http://www.amsawyer.com/

or click the various pages lists on the far right of your screen >>>>>>>>>>

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Quote (7/30/16)

People believe they can’t move a mountain because they don’t realize that it’s just piles of tiny pebbles. Perception changes reality.

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In Bed – Poem

Now that nightfall has consumed the sun,

And my body screams desperately for rest,

All the last day’s paths have finally been run,

And to all my opportunities, I gave my best.

Now my dark room flashes from light outside,

As my eyes adjust to the sudden black,

Through a maze I walk, touch my only guide,

Praying not to stub my toe or hear a sudden crack.

With a sigh of relief I reach the bed,

Feeling the soft, cool fabric as I throw back the sheet,

Wasting no more time, on to the pillow I rest my head,

As through the window, a gentle breeze blows across my feet.

Now wrapped warmly in my favorite sheets and pillows,

Eyes shut tight as dreams float through my head,

Without any cares of how anything else goes,

For I’m safe and snug here in my bed.

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Summer Love – Poem

There is so much I haven’t said to you,

So much more I want to be,

There is so much more I want to do for you,

So that my feelings are there to see.

This summer has been difficult and long,

But with you here, I would never fall,

You made this summer like a Lynyrd Skynyrd song,

Making this place the sweetest home of all.

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring,

I’m not sure what this winter will do,

Just know that my heart is bursting to sing,

And the song is all about you

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